There, I said it

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Being a parent to your children for the past 15 months has not always been easy. It took some time for us all to adjust. To learn to live together. They have done remarkably well. We have two different homes, two different parenting styles, but the children have thrived and are happy. They love you and they love their father. So why do you hate me? I have been there for your children. I have fed them, cared for them when they are sick, bandaged their injuries, taken them to school, and picked them up from school. I have gone to extra-curricular activities and purchased clothing, school supplies and gifts for them. I have hugged them when they are sad and shared in their happiness. I have disciplined them when needed and praised their achievements. I have never said ANYTHING unkind about you to them. I have put your picture in my home so they won’t miss you. I have loved them as any parent or mother should love the children of the man she loves.

The decision you made in June 2010, was yours and yours alone. And while I know the circumstances that led up to that decision, I also know some of the role you played in what happened. All of us who have been married know the role we play in our marriage. You tell anyone who will listen how wronged you were. How his actions were to blame. How he hurt you. But you know the truth. Your actions during the last 10 years of your marriage were just as hurtful and devastating to him, but I doubt you saw that. And what you have done since convinces me that you have no intention of moving on. Your desire to hate and punish is what keeps you up at night. No one with those feelings inside of them can ever rest peacefully.

I know you were hurt when he was able to move on so quickly. But I did not cause your marriage to end. I did not lure him away. I am not a home wrecker, a whore, or a slut as you and your friends have put it. I am someone who fell in love with someone you were eager to be rid of.

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One response »

  1. Whenever someone trashes someone else, it is not just envy of them, but often guilt. The person calling you those horrible names, might well be wearing those labels. The truth will set everyone free, and at the rate the wheels of the karma bus are turning, my guess is the lack of sleep is also due to knowing it won’t be long now and everyone will know she was no victim, but guilty as sin of the things she claims to be so hurt about. BEFORE those pains were inflicted on her. Ah, what goes around comes around….

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